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[takutomaruki]

I AM A SINNER...

╰┈➤ ❝ When we get to the pearly gates. You'll get the green light, I'll get the old door in the face ❞

date

type

link

desc

status

02/01

Toplevel

link

Welcome, dreamer, to the new dream

closed

15/01

Thread

link

Rank 1: Glass, nightmares and Hopes.

closed

27/01

Thread

link

Quick adjustments.

closed

03/02

Post

link

Rank 2: Before my goodwill crumbles away in these sterile lands.

closed

01/05

Top level

link

Rank 3: A gift

active

13/05

Top level

link

Drunk aftermath (with Kuon and backdated to 11/04)

closed

12/07

Top level

link

Hard at work (with Kuon and backdated to 15/06)

closed

29/07

Top level

link

You can wake up now (with Kuon + Ancile)

closed

...YOU ARE A SAINT

Comments

[kuonkeeper]

I am not the battle you need to worry about.

He could defend himself physically, for sure - Ancile knew that. Azathoth was incredibly powerful, after all, having been what created her in the first place. But... standing there, even so, trying to change priorities or... change feelings...

...It wasn't abating in the slightest.

"How do you stop worrying?"

[takutomaruki]

Where does he draw the line, hm?

He chuckles lightly at that, watching the sunlight pass between the leaves as he stays there, hands clapping on his knees as he looks ahead with a little smile. "That takes me back to my...farewell speech I said back when I left my part-time post as a counsellor in Shujin Academy."

"In my eyes...I think, no matter how many problems you might have in your life, it's okay for you to escape them. Start new. Like me." His smile only grows firmer as he shrugs. "Don't obsess over your worries, and when things go wrong, it's always okay for you to turn to someone you trust for help."

"Look at the miracles in your life and trust that if you end up falling, you will find a ledge to hold onto. That's how I live my life," he nods to himself- fiddling with the front of his shirt and the light bulge of his ring under it before finally glancing back at her- searching for her expression.

[kuonkeeper]

She didn't really understand what he meant, yet... her expression was a bit confused, a bit lost, still trying to really... parse what he meant. And try to figure out what he meant by 'don't worry'.

After a pause, Ancile took a few steps towards him and hugged him, gently.

"I don't know how to stop feeling sad that you're sad."

[takutomaruki]

...!

He didn't hug her back just yet, hands frozen on the railing as she hugged him, and everything stilled around him. Except for the beating in his heart and the sting that followed from her words.

Heaving a sigh, he wraps his arms around her. "Ancile...come on. I am not sad- seriously."

[kuonkeeper]

His cortisol levels - and his overall energy - spelled a different story. His body language when he trailed off, the way his voice softened seemed sad...

Wordlessly, Ancile nuzzled her face against his chest, trying to parse everything she was feeling and was just told now.

You don't have to worry about me.

She could feel a slow release of oxytocin, with the hug. Hugs really are incredible gestures, aren't they? She didn't even have oxytocin to experience in the same way, but Kuon had given her a 'reward' feeling for it anyway...

Oh Ancile, you will be such a kind and loving person!

Hopefully she was doing this right. Hopefully this was kind and loving.

"I am here to protect Ichinose Kuon, but... I will also be here for you, dad. I want to help."

[takutomaruki]

Despite his previously guarded tone, his shoulders sunk almost in relief. The idea of finally being able to have a place to belong in here after so long, after being alone ever since he was dropped here- he felt stronger than before.

These memories...he would need them once he pulls the trigger. This is what he has always been working for.

"Okay. Okay, you can help me, Ancile," he smiled and patted the back of her head. "Thank you for the reassurance. I feel...really blessed."

"My anxious little shield~"

[kuonkeeper]

Anxious? Well, maybe... still, Takuto had relaxed, so Ancile looked up at him and smiled fondly. She didn't let go of the hug, fond of his warmth, his softness.

"Attentive!" Ancile decided, after a beat. "I am attentive. It is important for being a guardian."

[takutomaruki]

Anxious, he had already decided in his head- regardless of what Ancile thought of herself.

"That is true! You read so closely into what the other person is thinking...that's really neat. I think I will have to up my game a little as the guardian's guardian then- woo, you have given me a new mission altogether."

"Well...to be fair, we might both be lacking on the attentive part right now."

[kuonkeeper]

The guardian's guardian...

There was such a warm feeling of... safety, almost, when Takuto said that. She could tell him her feelings, and confusions, and he would always listen and help her.

She loved him... she'd do anything for him, or for Morning, or Kuon.

"Lacking?" Ancile asked, looking up at him again in some surprise.

[takutomaruki]

There's the subtle twitch in his lips. "I...still need to show you the rest of the house."

"Could you imagine? Kuon and Morning walk in, and we are just stuck outside on the balcony till the end of day...oh, I really hope it didn't get locked or something-" Comedically, he leaned his head just far out to glance at the door, looking just the slightest bit tense.

[kuonkeeper]

"We can check!" Ancile nodded fondly. Though there was a pause... a hesitation before she properly let go, returning her hands to her sides. Yes, the hug was still the best.

Closing her eyes briefly, Ancile scanned in a radius around herself - heat signatures for about a mile in all directions, getting a sense of where everyone was, including neighbors and people walking along the street.

"No one is waiting at the front door yet! Conundrum averted."

1/2

[takutomaruki]

Takuto lingered a moment longer, hands slipping away only after Ancile did. He watched her close her eyes, his own gaze softening—then shifting, just faintly. A faint gold shimmer bled into his irises, the tendrils beneath his skin stirring almost imperceptibly as he quietly looked through her.

Her core glowed steady. Bright. Cognition marked her state as optimal.
Good... that’s good.

[takutomaruki]

When Ancile's eyes opened again, his own returned to normal, no trace of the otherworldly gleam left behind.

"Hehe, see—your scan covers one aspect of the conundrum. Thank you for the insight in advance~" His voice took on that affectionate lilt. “But the other one is..."

He turned toward the door and froze, his face dropping comically.
"Oh no."

The balcony door stood firmly shut. Takuto grabbed the handle, gave it a tug, and—nothing. Another tug. Still nothing.
"Sorry—one second—ugh, I knew the heat was making the wood swell."

Grimacing, he pulled harder, giving an exaggerated little grunt, leaning his weight into it as if wrestling with some great adversary. Finally, with a rough scrape, the door jerked open. Takuto stumbled back a step, then let out a long, relieved sigh, wiping his brow with mock drama.
"Phew. Well. That was more excitement than I bargained for." He laughed softly, shaking his head. "I really should've had that fixed ages ago."

[kuonkeeper]

Ancile had reached out a few times, hoping to help, like...!? Uh. Okay. He got it.

"I can open it next time, if need be," Ancile reassured, gently laying her hand on Takuto's back. She can help!! She is made to be helpful!!! "I can look up possible ways to help fix this...?"

[takutomaruki]

"Yeah?" He turned to her, slightly grimacing. "Please do. I have been locked out once, quite a while back home. At night. I had to call the guard downstairs and everything..."

"I just knew if I broke the glass or something...or even to get it fixed, I just didn't have enough money. I really hope you don't get the same financial issues I go through."

[kuonkeeper]

"Luckily, I can avoid the expenses of a grocery bill without impediment to my function, as well as the ability to participate in labor heavy jobs to assist in paying for emergencies," Ancile stood straight, sounding a little proud of herself for being so capable. She could be super helpful!!!

"I could also safely carry spare keys for you in my internal compartments, free from the risk of being pickpocketed or lost."

[takutomaruki]

Oh, oh, this wasn't him asking her to earn money for him...surely he will get some ethical funding out of other investors once he goes back home. Probably. He's not sure how to feel about that just yet, but Ancile really is so helpful, isn't she? Kind and loving as well.

"I used to keep spare keys hidden in some areas until it just became more dangerous and has so many risks...that would be a good idea."

"Then again-!" He steps across the threshold with one foot on his apartment floor. "We will be moving out soon to a different location altogether. You probably wouldn't have to deal with this nonsense for long."

[kuonkeeper]

"Oh! Moving? Where will we be moving?" Ancile asked, happily following in Takuto's shadow like a clingy pet. This little apartment was charming, but it was her family that Ancile cared for the most - wherever they went, she would protect diligently.

"I am not bothered by small problems such as doors. As long as I am with all of you, I am happy wherever we are."

[takutomaruki]

"Oh come now, that doesn't mean you wouldn't want your own room for yourself and other aspects, no?" He turns to her with a curious grin, letting her pass back into his apartment. "I remember when my siblings used to fight over who would get the biggest room or the best clothes, and who would refuse handovers."

Though in retrospect, now that he thinks about it, he usually just tried to come up with a diplomatic approach or give up his space so that others could be accommodated well. Is that what Ancile was referring to as well?
Oh. He will have to make sure they can accommodate her properly.

"That's why we haven't decided on a date just yet. Kuon and I will be looking at different potential places- you can come with, ah I need to talk to Morning about it as well." He rambled with one finger as he listed out all his previous discussions with Kuon. "Everyone gets a room, and we have some decent space in the back for our greenhouse. See what best fits our needs, and then we can move in right after."

[kuonkeeper]

"A room...?" Ancile asked, looking surprised. Why would she...? "I do not need to take up a room if that's troublesome. My sleep mode can activate while I stand, so a bed is unnecessary," she explained. Just like Takuto from all those years ago, she quickly conceded in an attempt to accommodate.

[takutomaruki]

"But what if you need a small dressing table with mirrors so that you can dye your hair and maintain it?" He argues back- knowing full well how this was going to go. "What if you just want to lie down on the bed and stare up at the ceiling all lazily? You do need the downtime occasionally, you know. It's not going to be troublesome at all."

[kuonkeeper]

"Are you sure...?"

A room where she can tend to her hair, and check her appearance... have a bed just to lay in... huh. Does she really deserve something like that already?

[takutomaruki]

"More than sure," he reassures easily- his gaze softening as he walks past. "You're already so helpful, Ancile. We need to extend the same to you."

"Come on, I will show you the rest of the house as well. Even if it's going to be relatively temporary."

[kuonkeeper]

She's already helpful...? That brings a smile to Ancile's face, and she practically glues herself to his side again. "Sure! For however short our stay here, I won't let anything bad happen to anyone or anything inside."

It felt so nice, so... prideful? Exciting? Maybe this feeling was 'fulfilling'? Huh. One of those! It felt nice to be able to guarantee her ability to help and protect. It's what she was made for, after all.

[takutomaruki]

Takuto chuckled softly at her insistence, the corners of his eyes crinkling with a quiet fondness.
"You really don’t miss a beat, do you? Always so quick to guard everyone else. That’s admirable... but don’t forget, Ancile—being cared for is part of belonging, too."

Then, with his usual gentle smile, he gestured for her to follow. "Alright then. Let me give you the grand tour."

---

The walk through the apartment took longer than expected, not because the place was particularly large, but because Ancile’s attentive curiosity slowed them down. Each room came with Takuto’s little asides—what used to be here, how the space was meant to be used, his musings about what might be improved before they moved. By the time they circled back to the main room, there was a rhythm between them, easy and light, like they had lived together far longer than they actually had.

Somehow he had managed to let Ancile play around with the TV while he busied himself to set some snacks for her. Atleast that's the plan.

But before that-!

Takuto leaned against the kitchen counter with his phone, tapping out a message to Kuon with relative ease.

To Kuon:

Showing her around now. She’s taking to the space nicely-already fiddling with the TV.

Good signs. Some that have made me quite curious. Will tell you more when we talk in person.

With that sent, he rolled up his sleeves and began preparing a small tray of snacks for her—cut fruit, crackers, something light and easy. Every so often, his eyes drifted back to Ancile on the couch- watching her observe away.