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[takutomaruki]

I AM A SINNER...

╰┈➤ ❝ When we get to the pearly gates. You'll get the green light, I'll get the old door in the face ❞

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02/01

Toplevel

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Welcome, dreamer, to the new dream

closed

15/01

Thread

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Rank 1: Glass, nightmares and Hopes.

closed

27/01

Thread

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Quick adjustments.

closed

03/02

Post

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Rank 2: Before my goodwill crumbles away in these sterile lands.

closed

01/05

Top level

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Rank 3: A gift

active

...YOU ARE A SAINT

Comments

[takutomaruki]

Oh.

He thought she meant it some other way. "Sorry, I misread that, I guess," he looks away. "She didn't dump me...would you be surprised if I said I was engaged? We were together for most of our lives, with a small break-up in between before picking things up again."

[dollmaxing]

Ah-- then the other unfortunate fate. Engaged, dating for a long time...

"My sympathies for your loss. ...But I can see you engaged, at least - you're very enjoyable. I imagine there are plenty of women that would confide in you once you're past mourning."

[takutomaruki]

Oh wow, he was really blowing this out of proportion. The compliment aside, which made him sputter and stutter out of pure confusion. "No, I am not- see that's the thing. People confide in me cause I am trained in it again- I am not mourning her."

"It was all my fault in the end." He offers her a weak smile as he finishes the last of his soup. "For being a bit of a coward. It's been a good few years since then, and she's much happier now! Much happier than back then...there's nothing more I am grateful for."

[dollmaxing]

...? What in the world is he talking about? Ichinose's brows furrowed in thought as she examined him, turning the words over in her head...

"...A coward... oh! Did you run from the altar?"

1/2

[takutomaruki]

Maruki began sipping away on the soup, hoping that she would drop the topic. It's a thing of the past and he has much bigger things to worry about and work on so-

Did you run from the altar?

"...!"

"Bwfah-" Maruki chokes on his soup, some of the enoki gladly making their way to his windpipe as he coughs and sets the bowl on his lap. "Wha- okay."

2/2 (he will mention the incident after sadhd just give him a bit)

[takutomaruki]

He ended up laughing- not expecting that speculation at all. Most people didn't ask beyond that but Ichinose-? She did.

"I wish it was like that. Honestly."

[dollmaxing]

Well, she was terribly off the mark - but at least he was laughing about it instead of looking offended. Lucky her!

"Well, then, what happened?"

[takutomaruki]

She was insistent. Maruki tilted his head at her, trying to grasp her intentions. The look in his eyes held as much lethargy as the night before, even with the smile persistent on his face.

"..."

"It's a thing in the past now," he starts as he finally places his bowl on the table. "Our relationship was tested by things beyond our control. Things she wouldn't have recovered from if I hadn't pulled away."

A dull ache overflows his senses. He leaned forward, gripping his nose to contain it when he swore he felt something pull at his mind again.

"Haha! Sorry for being a bit of a buzzkill," he caught his breath as he pulled his hand away to glance back at her.

[dollmaxing]

Something strange and painful then. Miscarriage? A traumatic event? Had he somehow abused her? The latter part seemed uncharacteristic, but looks could be deceiving.

Still, Ichinose just tilted her head, looking him over.

"No, I'm sorry to bring it up. You look distressed."

[takutomaruki]

"Now you sound like Shibusawa," he shook his head with a wry chuckle. "It's fine. It's been like what- 6 years now? I've been working on it..." His gaze drifted to the couch as he finally crossed his legs together. "In any case, I am not looking for a romantic relationship anytime soon."

"...here especially." Oh, he hopes that wasn't an awkward statement, but it is true.

[dollmaxing]

It didn't make her feel awkward - in fact, it got a bit of a bark of a laugh from her.

"Hah! God, no, could you imagine? Falling for someone in a place like this, only to get whisked away and be literal universes apart? That's tragic."

[takutomaruki]

Isn't that right? Maruki couldn't even fathom something that was unachievable. That inconceivable..

Ah, but Rumi was here, wasn't she? He even thought he could salvage a relationship with her again, even as a friend.
Until he was told that she isn't real.

"I do see the romantic appeal in it," he admits with a soft smile on his lips. "Like star-crossed lovers who only met in this one extraordinary circumstance out of the million universes."

[dollmaxing]

"Wouldn't the heart crumble from something like that?" Ichinose chuckled. She wasn't being snide, at least not intentionally - that sort of heartbreak seemed extreme when most romantic couples whined about being only a city apart. How much more severe would it be to have it be literally impossible to see the person you cared for?

[takutomaruki]

It's a fair question to ask, given everything. He knows a lot of things he believes in don't hold much weight when you weigh the truth- your internal world with the bitter external one- you are often left dissatisfied.

"A heart crumbles easily," he says slowly. "At the end of the day, it's all about how much you are willing to sacrifice, isn't it? For both yourself and your partner."

And he would sacrifice gladly. Time and again.

He folds his arms on his lap, growing quiet.

[dollmaxing]

"If both parties would get hurt, then wouldn't it be better to not entertain those feelings at all...? Or can you just not help it, at that point?"

The latter would make sense - maybe that's the difference between herself and others. She could easily shift gears, stop wanting something she can't have and focus on the attainable, the practical...

Though, things are much more attainable than they seem, aren't they? EMMA proved as much.

"Actually, on that train of thought, I wonder if one could bridge this world and other worlds more concretely - supposedly our messaging apps continue working through time and space and the multiverse, so who's to say we couldn't come up with a way to reinforce that connection more directly?"

[takutomaruki]

"Oh?" She has his attention almost too easily- leaning against the couch with one elbow angled on the cushion.

"Are we still thinking digitally or more so through cognition?" he asks. "Because I can imagine you could probably utilize slightly higher tech- like the ones I have seen the Hasegawas use so that you can, to an extent, interact with others."

"But cognitively I know Igor holds all the cards." There's a tsk like even he's annoyed by it. Which he is. "You would need to sway the entire world along with its recipients to cause a fundamental change in the system."

"That said...sorry, please continue. I am curious to hear your thoughts."

[dollmaxing]

"If the data can transfer a call connection, it can transfer any kind of information - digital ought to be incredibly easy just by reverse-engineering how the connection itself works, paranormal or not. An AI could be sent to another universe, for example."

Hmm... Ichinose ponders a bit, taking a minute to eat all of the scallops in her bowl.

"Which may be pertinent information if those two from the future need last-minute adjustments to the program I'm making for them. I could potentially build them an AI - not self sufficient, mind - that could react and patch code in real time as that world's EMMA and Ichinose attempted to change their programming to defend themselves. Hmm. And then there's the matter of physical matter... or a person. Depending on exactly the magic behind the connections in the phone work, perhaps there might be some way to transfer a person's cognitive self through that connection... they may need a body or to be digitized on the other end, but it could functionally be them. Or at least a copy of them. Scanning the mind to catalogue one's personhood... now there is a thought..."

[takutomaruki]

Maruki fell silent for a while, cataloguing Ichinose’s words in his head. An AI that could react and patch code in real life, he supposed that Ichinose could pull it off again- given that she made EMMA. "That EMMA and Ichinose probably have something similar to that too."

And then there’s the idea of physical matter. A person. The idea of transferring a whole person from one universe to another was absurd- especially from a scientific concept. But cognition recognized that pattern and flipped it over- instead unveiling the discrepancies in how time and space can be percieved in a more primal way. From areas that existed between dream and reality to otherwise.

"If one could possibly replicate the nueral pattern down to the T- that will essentially make a clone that holds all your memories and experiences intact." He adds after. "But to sustain that system you would need a huge power source, wouldn't you?"

[dollmaxing]

"Oh, naturally... but with you and Azathoth here, I'm not concerned about limitations of power," Ichinose stated completely matter-of-factly. "Hmmm... maybe programming a basic AI infrastructure for a cognitive scan to map onto, saving time from shortcuts involving the senses and focusing on what makes someone who they are... that might be an interesting little project."

Intriguing. Ichinose stopped to finish her miso, setting the bowl down on the coffee table and fishing out a few more almonds to crunch on in thought.

"That would be a very direct way to get a more intimate understanding of the human mind."

Of the human heart. And why she lacks what others have.

"I think I could do it... I could use a brain scan to give an AI a heart."

[takutomaruki]

Maruki's smile grew at the statement, and he was glad that she had admitted that outright. She came up with the ideas, and I did everything in my power to make them come true. He lets her stew on it, coming to conclusions of his own in quiet. It did make him wonder, for example, like how he had manifested her clothes from actualisation itself. Through Azathoth, he sorted out a simple outfit through the power of thought, and with a bit of reference to how her Yukata was, it was easier to come up with measurements.
But the very idea of manifesting clothing like that...he was sure he and Azathoth had the power to sustain a force like that.

Whatever happened to wanting to take away people's hearts, Ichinose?

"The human mind fascinates you quite the bit, doesn't it?" he remarks as he watches her set away the bowl. He had questions burning in his mind- things far away from the current matter at hand but one thing at a time.
He leaned forward, excitement evident in his eyes. "Though you could interchangeably use it with the term heart. The heart of your brain," he taps at the side of his head. "The limbic system specifically. A fascinating place that creates psychological patterns with external stimuli."

"In the end, it all goes back to that, doesn't it?" he remarks, reading her carefully. Her little quirks. The way she chewed on almonds to get her mind running. Her insistence on understanding the human heart in the way she knew how to.

"In a cognitive space, I can manifest...copies of people. To an extent, they are soulless husks, similar to most of the cognitions we have met here. I have been working on trying to create the perfect physical being for reasons similar to yours, for assistance. Support, but they never lingered for long. Not beyond the walls of my palace."

"That instance might be similar to an AI not developing at its own pace. The moment it steps out of my palace, it loses cognizant value. It needs strict orders from me or Azathoth by extension. The gap between the internal and external mind causes unrest."

"It's essentially a persona. In practice."

[dollmaxing]

"So you can create, but autonomy is difficult. I can program autonomous thinkers, but manifesting them here - I'm not sure I could do it so easily."

Interesting. Ichinose returned the curious grin to Maruki, catching how much he was leaned forward and how she had caught his rapt attention. And why wouldn't he? If he was trying to create someone real...

"We should experiment with this line of thought. See if we can collaborate and create a self-sufficient entity together, one that can maintain autonomy outside of the Palace and have self-determination."

[takutomaruki]

They were filling each other's weak points. It would be so easy...making sure that he has all the influence over a person so that he could take care of them properly. Make sure their wish is something that would be within their reach and give them something tangible to hold onto while he tries to figure out the best approach to dictate the collective unconscious in the right direction.

"Watch them grow and learn new things. Survive against all circumstances in the right environment and make them aware enough so that they can support others." He looks almost too wistful. Hopeful even.

"We will have to conduct experiments. Produce prototypes. Evidence of a sign of life... I could even recruit personas or shadows to test the idea of a brain scan. I love that idea."

"Say if I tap into your cognition- how much would you be willing to bet that I will get a crash course on AI programming?" He genuinely sounds serious, staring at her with all the attention in the world. "

[dollmaxing]

"Ohh? What knowledge do I get to know in return, hmm? Your cognitive psience studies? I haven't been able to observe it directly, so I am technically behind you and EMMA," Ichinose chuckled in amusement. It's not a no - sharing a little of her knowledge directly sounds risky, but fascinating.

[takutomaruki]

"I will teach you the art of desanding clams," he teases with a grin. "Or ways to accelerate the process while you are already hungover. Without me around. With me I could get you all this with my eyes closed-"

He stops, realizing what he's saying. "I do realize that's not something to be proud about right now."

After a moment's pause, the teasing slips. "I am joking. Like I said I have my papers if you ever need to read through them. They are all yours to refer to."

"Not to mention- again its the idea of autonomy. I could probably structure the idea of a computer or an AI but for it to grow...I need the knowledge from a sharp mind. That mind is you."

[dollmaxing]

"True enough - but I think if I program the AI and you talk to them first, that ought to help solidify the process of actually making them physical, don't you think? But I did promise I would teach you coding - if you want to poke around in my mind and learn that way, you have my permission."